good bye

They say it's hard to say hello, 
I feel I can't say good bye.

I don't know when I will get to see you again,
but I know I have so many things to tell you

Still, I just leave. 
I just leave feeling confused, 
why I didn't say how much I am going to miss you

Why I didn't say, how nice it is to be with you.
Why I didn't say, that I don't want to leave,
and kept hoping that you will ask me to stay

The last memories of me you will have will be of our parting,
but did I make it something you can cherish?

In the rush of planning the next moment how I miss to live the now.
I could have said this, done that, is the only repent which stays

Hellos are important and so are goodbyes
Make your Hello cheerful and good bye warm.

Because from where we end, from there we start again!

काश

मेरे  हर पल का हिसाब रखने वाले,
काश तुमने मेरा भी ख़याल रखा होता 

आईने के सामने के मेरे वक़्त को गिनने वाले,
मर्दो से भरे इस जहान में हर रोज जो लड़ाईया मैं  लड़ती हूँ उनको भी गिना होता 

मेरी आँखो में जो काजल मैं भरती हूँ 
उसकी जग़ह जो ग़म मैं उनमे छुपाती हूँ उसे देखा होता  

मेरी परेशानियों और थकान को भूलकर एक पल भी बैठे बीना 
घऱ में घुसते ही जो काम पे लग जाती हूँ उसे भी देखा होता 

तुमसे ज्यादा करने के बाद भी तुमसे बराबर होने के लिए 
जो मैं रोज घर के बाहर जाती हूँ  उसे भी देखा होता 

मेरी चुप्पी को गुरुर समझने के पहले 
उसके पीछे जो निराशा हैं उसे देखा होता 

औरत को नर्म होना है  बचपन से ये सीखा तुमने 
पर उसके सख्त होने की वज़ह  को अगर जाना होता 

जानती हूँ करली उम्मीद मैंने ज्यादा की 
काश मेरे जिस्म की जग़ह रूह को छू पते तुम 

मेरी खूबियों को बेशक न देखना तुम कभी,
कमियों के आगे बढ़ कर काश मुझे देख पाते तुम 

Life Happens

In the summers of late 1980’s the first born boy of a well know north Indian Brahmin family got hitched to a beautiful first born girl of another well-known Brahmin Family. Summer was on its peak and so was their love and then after 9 months Life Happened and yours truly came into this world J

From childhood, I have been trained that I need to take the legacy of the first born to next level and show all the younger ones how to lead life. Not just my own siblings, my first cousins, my second, third, fourth cousins, my neighborhood kids, I was supposed to be the role model for everyone. 4 year old kid and so much pressure to perform, I became a perfect obedient child any parent would want. But that also made me an introvert. Or should I say I had split personality disorder, because I was a super fun child in school but very serious and studious kid at home. I was doing good in studies and well in co-curricular activities, teacher’s pet and a perfect role model, life was going fine for everyone until my parents decide to add some spice in my life.

They made me, the not so sporty girl to go in NCC (National Cadet Core), and like the obedient girl I was, I joined it for them. First time I stayed away from home for a week. Homesick and socked as we used to sleep on floor and bath inside a tent in a jungle, I was counting days to go back home. And on the final day, I came to know that this camp was the selection camp for basic leadership camp and I am selected for next camp which means I must live here for 10 more days.  My uncle who used to live in that same city was there to meet me, I was crying to go back home and hence he called my mom. She heard me out and asked me to give the phone to my uncle and told him, make sure she stays there and does not run back home. I was stunned, did my parents disowned me? Will I always live in this jungle?

Now I had only one way to survive, I must like what is there in front of me, accept it and move on. Therefore, I gave my 100% in those 10 days in all the assignments and activities we got to do. I tried to make friends so that my stay becomes comfortable. Soon I stared to like this whole thing and an introvert started to open-up. Next year I took part in republic day camp and represented my state in national. Won the nationals in rifle shooting and 1^st runner up in best cadet nationwide. It was indeed a very proud moment for me and my family when I got to shake hands with our then prime minister Mr. Atal Bihari Bajpai. I returned home after 2 months as a very confident teenager, and that’s where life happened.

However, soon after that I had my boards and being the first born I had to do very well there, you see role model. And as an obedient kid from middle class Indian family, I went for engineering and became one J

Years flew, campus was done, I had a job offer in my hand, but patents decided to give a new twist in the tale. They wanted me to stay back home and look for some opportunity in my hometown, as they were worried how I will live alone in a big city. And I was shocked, are they not the same people who made sure I don’t come back home from that jungle. But I decided to do things my way this time and came to Bangalore. And life happened when parents saw me not just surviving in a new city alone but also living happily and doing well at work.

Years passed and now parents had an-other thing in their “TO DO list” which they were eager to tick out and hence started looking for alliance for me. In the search of same I met this snooty guy whom I hated in beginning and later fell for. Yes, life happened again to me in the most unexpected way and time.

By nature, Indians are very caring people. We care about what’s happening in other’s life more than what’s going on in our own. Hence now it was time for me to prove to the society that my reproductive system is working fine. On first day of my maternity break I was feeling so bored, I though let me go to a parlor and waste my hared earned money. Due date was still 15 days away but as expected, life happens to me when I expect it the least. I was rushed from a massage room to the labor room. And the most beautiful part of my life I lived that day amid all the madness which was going around.

Even now after all these years, the pressure of being the role model and perfect first born is still there. But the intensity has reduced over time. Now whenever I get to talk to my younger cousins, or colleagues and friends. I tell them that don’t be like anyone else, just be what you are. because you cannot control life you can only live life. And the most magical moments of your life will happen when you expect it the least. Moments which will change your perspective and thinking and make you a better and happier version of yourself. So you just keep living and let the life happen!

PS: This write-up was my Ice breaker speech in Toastmasters 

5 Things I learned the Hardway

Life is not a bed of roses, not even for the most blessed people, they have their own set of challenges. And especially when you want to improve yourself and your life with every passing day, it’s not a cakewalk. Everyday bring us different experiences, it’s up to us if we want to learn from those or let it go. Every person who crosses our life and every incident which takes place is an opportunity to absorb and improve ourselves. And in my existence on this planet, in the process of becoming better and happier I have learned few things the hard way

1    1. You can’t make everyone happy

How much ever you like this to happen, it’s very difficult to make everyone around you happy. Each one can have different requirements and at times they can be contradictory to one another. You cannot make the points meet in such case. So, stop taxing yourself for pleasing everyone. I used to be a people-pleaser, will always put everyone before me, but I never got such gesture back from them. I kept burning myself and slowly there was lot of frustration buildup. Hence, I decided to stop pleasing everyone around me. I do things which are important, I try not to hurt anyone knowingly, but I don’t go extra miles to satisfy all of them in all possible ways.

2    2.  Your happiness is the key

Now that you are not busy pleasing other, concentrate on yourself. An empty glass can’t fill another one, until you are happy you can’t spread positivity. I have seen this personally, when I am happy I am more productive. My positive feeling radiates to people around me. When I sulk, I can’t be my best, and my happiness is my responsibility. So, work on your own happiness, create it, don’t expect other to do it for you.

3    3.  Be what you are

Never ever pretend to be what you are not. We pretend mostly to mingle with few or please few others. But that is not healthy for you. You can’t be what you are not for long and it will be disappointing for others also to know that they never knew the real your, comes across as a negative trait. Mostly people pretend to please others and as said earlier, you can’t please all and be happy. Be yourself, you will be comfortable, and you will find people around your who really value YOU. At the same time, be clear that pretending and improving are two different things 😊

4    4.  Physical and mental health are one

I learned this when I was going through a very low phase in my life (sometimes we tend to miss on our blessing and start counting only issues). Work stress was at its peak and I was still a new mother, I was trying hard to make ends meet and that somewhere was taking toll on me. When I talked about this to an expert, first thing she asked me was, do you drink enough water, do you do any physical activity/exercise, do you sleep enough. And as soon as I tried taking care of these things for a week, I saw significant improvement in my mood and behavior. I was amazed to see this and from then I am a true believer that mental and physical health are interrelated. So be whatever, do take time out to take care of yourself. Keep yourself hydrated, try to sleep for 6 hours at least, and do some exercise be it yoga/gym/ or just some walk. You will see the changes in you yourself.

1    5.  You have time

And after reading all the above points if your response is that I don’t have time to do any of this, then my friend you are wrong. You have time, you have good amount of time to do everything you want to do. All you need to do is, prioritize what you want to do and why. Cut on your screen time or time on internet and you will have time to exercise, read a book, meet a friend or have a hobby. It’s all about prioritizing and willingness to do. Trust me when I say this I am a mother of 4 after all 😊

Perfect Mother

Motherhood is rewarding yet challenging. My mother used to cook for me every time I crave to eat something special, on other hand I do order-in when my son asks for some special treat. My mom had to go and meet my teachers if she wanted any update on me, I can Whats-app my kid’s teacher or can investigate his daily activities through the school app. Technology has made life easier for all of us, including the mothers. Yet in this time and age being a mother is not simple.

Now the challenges are different. You are constantly getting judged and compared. The pressure of being the prefect mother, who have perfect kids and perfect home is more than ever. Mother who is expected to be in shape and look polished all the time, Mother who is working so that she can be the provider too and can bring more on table. There is a lot of compression and believe it or not we end up giving in to it mostly and burn ourselves.

Hence today on mother’s day I take a moment to congratulate all the mothers and tell them that you are doing amazingly great job as a mom. And never ever feel guilty for these:

• Your Body does not look like before, how it can be. It has shaped a human, kept a life inside it for 9 months and later nurtured it though breastfeeding.
•  The stretchmark which makes you shy away from flaunting your belly. Remember for every stretchmark you are sad about there is a woman who wants it.
• Your house is unkempt, that is okay. Kid is your priority, look after them, don’t be harsh on yourself. House will be cleaned later, or ask for help
• Took a career break, and there is a lot of competition out there. You will be few years behind in your career but the memories you created with kids while staying back home will be cherished forever.
• Going to work leaving an infant with someone else. When the kid grows up, they will have a role model of independence and multitasking. Also, they will become independent and social sooner.
•  Not able to attend all PTMs or take kid to every single activity and class due to your job timings. Kids will excel in things they are good at anyway and look-up to you for being committed to your work. Let your partner attend some, Dad and kid will improve their bond.
• You are human, so you make mistakes. Kids will learn to have acceptance and give chances. They will get to see real life and won’t be too disappointed when they grow up and face the world.

So, this Mother’s Day in place of signing the glory of mother’s love and sacrifices, let us accept and celebrate the imperfections. Because at end what my kid will remember about me is my love for him and nothing else. Because no mother is perfect or imperfect, every mother is the best mother to her kids.

 

DIY- Bottle Photo frame

DIY and crafts are such a stress buster, it gives me lot of happiness and satisfaction. The confidence boost for the creative me and the pleasure of recycling or up-cycling the old/unwanted stuff make me glad. Below is a pic of few of the bottles which I pained in past using acrylic paints or glass paints for your reference 😊 they are easy to do and looks beautiful on display.

But this time I wanted to do something other than painting them, and the idea of making bottle photo frame stuck to me. To my surprise it came out very well, it’s easy and fun craft to do with kids also during summer vacation.

This bottle my brother got from Thailand for me, I like its shape, wide enough to display picture, hence I selected this bottle for this craft. Enough of my blabbering, let me share with you all, how I made this bottle photo frame.

Things we need:

·       Empty clean glass bottle

·       Sand

·       Sea shells (as I had beach theme in mind)

·       Pearls or beads for decoration

·       Hot glue gun

·       skewer sticks

·       Photo of your choice

1# First, gather all the stuff at one place so that you don’t have to move around looking for things 😊

2# using a funnel put the sand inside the bottle, little at a time. I have used black and normal sand. Fill only less than ¼ of the bottle. In case you don’t have funnel handy, use a pager like I did in picture.

3# Now roll the photo and insert it inside the bottle. Go slow, make sure it goes and sits well in the sand. Do cut the picture if its big for the bottle. Adjust it inside the bottle using the skewer sticks. Have patience and do this slowly, don’t shake the bottle else the sand might come out

4# Add seashell or anything which you want to add inside the bottle for decoration (as per your theme). Using skewer sticks adjust it at the place you want it to sit. I added only 2 as bottle was small.

5# once you get your desired placement of photo inside the bottle, tie some cotton on skewer sticks and carefully clean the bottle from inside for any stains of sand and dust.

6# now it’s time to seal our creation. If you have the original cap of bottle, then use that or else you can use beads or shell etc. like I did.

7# using beads, glitters, pearls etc. decorate the bottle from outside as per your choice. I used seashells, hot glue gun helped to stick them on glass bottle.

8# Done! Put it on display 😊

The picture I have used here was taken during out Dubai vacation. It was Vivaan’s first Beach visit, so I wanted this picture to be framed with beach theme. I have kept it on shelf along with other souvenirs we had got from Dubai, and they all look great together😊 I am very happy with the outcome and hope you all like it too. Now go and try it out yourself. Happy Crafting!!

जिंदगी

जिंदगी तु बस  इतना  बता  की  तु चाहतीं क्या है....
क्या भीड़  में  भी तनहाई तेरी  जरूरत हैं|

अपनो के  नाम  पे  तुघे परछाई  तक बर्दाश्त नहीं....
अंधेरो  से इश्क़ करना  हीं  तेरी फितरत  है ?

जो मिलता  नहीं उसके  पीछे  दौड़ी  चली  जा  रही  है....
जो पास  है उसे  भूल  जाना  तेरी आदत है ?

तू खिचेगी  मुझे  या मैं  तुझको  थामूंगी, ये  फैसला  मेरा  होगा  तेरे  मशवरे की न मुझे जरुरत है  ....

मैं धुंडु  रौशनी या खुद  सवेरा  बन  जाऊ  ...ये मेरी  चाह  है तेरी राह  नहीं |

अपनी  खुशियों  में खिल  जाऊ या जल  के रौशन  उनको  कर  जाऊ ...अब  बस यही  सवाल  है, शिकायत  कोई  नहीं !

Your Life Your Responsibility Your Decision

My Dad is a salaried employee and unlike few of my close relatives

who did very well in their business and have a good cash flow all the time he only
has a fix income every month. Still If I compare the lifestyle he has
provided to me and my siblings is nothing less than my well off cousins.Dad
and my mom together provided us the best things in life, be it cloths, food,
education, vacations or values. They have always encouraged us to do the right things,
and plan for things we want to do in long run.

The art of saving was taught to us in very young age by mom.
We used to have our own piggy banks and as teenagers we had our own savings
account in bank too. In my case I had my first bank account at the age of 13,
which I owned jointly with my mom, but I was the one supposed to maintain the
account. Whenever I saved 500 or 1000 rupees from my pocket money I used to
deposit that to my bank account. This way I not only learnt the bank related
work but also became confident about myself.

We are two sisters and one brother and we have just 2 to 3
years of age gap between us. During our school and college days there were
times when my parents had to pay 3 equally big tuition fees at one go and they
did it all quite smoothly. None of us had to go for education loan or anything
of that sort. For mine and my sister’s weddings the kind of arrangements my
parents did left many of our relatives surprised. They were not expecting my parents
to organize such lavish weddings one after another, but my parents did it as
that was their dream and they have planned for it in advance. They did not take
financial help from anyone and were able to do it all on their own. They were always
able to give the best to their children and it was the result their good financial planning.

By seeing them and with my mom’s motivation I also started
with financial planning and investment quite early in my career.  And luckily I am married to a man who too comes from quite similar background as mine and believes in planning and being
independent. We are working together towards our financial and personal goals
and I am sure we will also be able to give the best of best to our future kids :)

Being independent financially not only gives one confidence
to face the future but also makes the present more peaceful. You can live in
today completely only when your future worries are all taken care of. In today’s
fast lifestyle we cannot guaranty that everything will be good in future but
with planned finances we can be sure of a financially secured future, which for
sure will be better than an unplanned one.

Life is so Simple without Pimple

We all go through different phases in life and every phase has its own importance, fun and memories. Childhood is always considered the most carefree and memorable phase in everyone’s life. But I feel even teenage has as much importance in our life as childhood. This is the time we see lots of changes in us physically and mentally, which stays with us forever.  Like my childhood I have very fond memories of my teenage days too. We used to go for educational tours, NCC Camps, sports meets and life was so much fun with friends back then. But with all these good memories there are some bad ones too and the constant struggle with pimples was one of them for me.

I have oily skin, which used to be super oily in my teenage days. Especially the area around my nose was something which used to feel as greasy as mom’s made aalu ka paratha with extra ghee. I used to have at least two pimples always on my face and one of them will always be on my nose. I am not blessed with cute, small nose and these red bumps used to make my fat nose even bigger. I used to envy the girls with clear skin; I used to feel super happy on days when I used to wake up with no new pimple on my face. Somewhere deep down I got this feeling that I can be good in academics and extracurricular activities, or be favorite student for my teachers but I am not going to be the best looking girl in school and I will never ever be the most attractive girl for any boy . I started hating my face and specially my nose. All this was actually taking a toll on my self-esteem and confidence.

One day for some pity reason I had a fight with my younger sister. Being the elder one I won the fight and was happy about my victory until I found this note which she left on my mirror. It had a fat nose drawn on it with lots of big red dots on it and a message that read “Didi, this is how your nose looks like. Fat & Ugly!!”. I was deeply hurt, not because of my sister’s rude words but I was hurt because I knew that it is all true. I cried and went to my mom with that note. As a mother would do, she scolded my sister and tried hard to convince me that I am not ugly. These pimples are just part of the physical changes my body is going through and it will go off soon. However, I was not convinced and that was when mom decided to take me to a Dermatologist. The Doctor gave me some lotion, and wash. She asked me to keep my face clean, avoid oily food and apply the lotion daily. I started following this regime. On weekends my mom used to make Neem and turmeric face pack for me, which helped in pimple reduction. She used to boil Neem levees and I used to wash my face with that water as the antiseptic properties of Neem kills the pimple producing bacteria.  All this hard work by mom and my dedication paid off and soon the pimples reduced and my skin became clearer. But as you know all good things in life are never permanent.

I left home to make my career, and bad lifestyle and carelessness towards my skin brought back these red bumpy monsters in my life. Due to my busy schedule I had no time to take care of my skin as mom used to do at home. I started losing hope and confidence once again. I tried to cover the redness of pimples with makeup but those quick fixes actually worsened my skin. That was when I decided to go back to the goodness of Neem. I started looking for skincare products available in market with Neem in it. And after trying different creams and washes I finally tried my hands on Garnier pure active Neem face wash. Regular usage of that actually helped me get my clear skin back. With this face wash I also controlled my diet and all this actually paid me off very well. Clear, glowing skin was back and back was my self confidence and happiness.

Pimple might look like a small red painful bump to others but to people who get this it is nothing less than a disastrous situation and believe me I am not exaggerating this at all J Negative effects which pimple has on one’s self confidence and social life are really scary. I am happy that I survived this problem twice in my life and the goodness of Neem helped me both the times.  Now I always suggest these tried and tested ways of keeping pimples at bay to everyone. We already have so many problems in life then why add one more to the list. Follow healthy lifestyle, use good skin care products and say bye-bye to pimples. After all life without pimple isreally simple and more fun !!

Drink for your eyes!!

Its summer time and to keep our self hydrated its must to have lots of fluid intake. I have been very reluctant to drinking water from childhood itself. I hardly drink 2 glass of water in one full day. As a child I drink only 1/4^th glass of water with every meal, my concerned mom used to tell me the impotence of drinking adequate amount of water for human body. But for me the water always tasted so plan and boring I never felt like drinking it. So my mom came up with an idea, she stayed giving me all sort of fruit juices and flavored water to increase my fluid intake. This worked for sometime but once I got used to, I stopped drinking that too.

 Then My dad came up with a brilliant idea or getting me a nice bottle which was in shape of a bear, I stared drinking juices and water again because I was in love with my bottle. Any juice or drink filled in the transparent bottle used to look very lovely and appealing. There on I am a big fan of fancy looking glasses, bottles and tumblers. They actually make the drink look beautiful, just by looking at it you feel like drinking it.  

Just imagine your favorite mint lemonade is served to you in a steel glass, will you enjoy it as much as when its served in a crystal see-through glass? Seeing the pieces of mint leaves and ice in the glass with a ring on lemon on the glass rim improves your desire to have that lemonade and hence the same lemonade tastes better than the one in steel glass. Then it becomes not just a drink to quiche your thrust for you but beautiful feast for your eyes as well.

Tasty food is not always beautiful food, but beautiful food is mostly the tastiest food!!

P.S. - This post is written for the My Beautiful Food contest organized by Indiblogger andBorosil.

The Way to Man’s heart goes through his stomach but starts from his eyes!!

There are two types of people in this world, one who live to eat and others who eat to live. I fall in second category, I never cared about food. Anything which had proper salt as was available to me I ate. But I got married to someone who falls in a different category altogether. My husband is a foodie, who loves his food. He is someone who doesn’t believe in quantity but in quality of food.

After marriage the first and the biggest change happened in me was the improvement in my culinary skills. For his love for food, I stared reading food blogs and subscribed to many food channels to learn new recopies but I failed to get perfect 10 from him every time. I made his favourite breakfast Aloo poha, by following the same recipe which I learn from his mom. It tasted almost same, but he was not impressed. I made his favourite Daal tadka by following exactly same recipe from master chef Sanjeev Kapoor. It tasted good to me but he was not impressed. I went through tones of videos and made delicious Dum Biryani, he ate full plate but still did not praise my food. I was heartbroken and decided to give-up on cooking. I poured my heart to him and said I will not cook anymore, and he should better hire a cook. That was when he told me that he loves my cooking, my food tastes good and the effort put to learn all the dishes is something he adores but what my cooking lacks is the presentation skill.

I argued “Presentation skill?? I need to prepare a PPT for my food or what?”

He hugged me and said “Honey! As you see the cloth first and when you like the print on it then only you touch it and decided on buying it. Same way, when one sees the food it should be appealing, and then only one feels that desire to eat it.”

“What food should look appealing?” I jerked my shoulders

He came close to me and said “just close your eyes and imagine you have 2 plates of Aloo poha in front of you. One is just a plate full of pale Aloo poha and the other one is a steaming hot plate full of bright yellow Aloo poha, which is nicely garnished with fresh coriander leaves and deep fried green chillies with a piece of lemon on side. Which one will you pick?”

I opened my eyes “obviously the second one.” I said excitingly.

“You see, you tasted the food with your eyes and selected which one is worth getting tasted by your tongue.” he was smiling like a proud parent.

I got my most important lessen of cooking that day from my husband. I was already feeling hungry after talking of food and so I prepared Dum biryani that day. I served the steaming hot spicy Dum briyani nicely garnished with deep fried onion slices and mint leafs in a beautiful serving bowl. I served chilled Raita in a glass bowl with coriander leaves dressing on it and a plate full of nicely cut cucumber, onions and tomatoes followed it. My husband loved the way the food was presented and I felt proud of my cooking.

There on, I always try to present my food in an interesting and appealing way then just putting it as it is on table. Nice crockery is as important for a dish to look appealing as right amount of salt and spices for a dish to taste good. As the old saying goes that the way to man’s heart starts from his stomach, however for the modern cosmopolitan man the way to his heart goes through his stomach but it always starts from his eyes ;)

P.S. - This post is written for the My Beautiful Food contest organized by Indiblogger and Borosil.

100 it is

Yes, finally after 3 years of blogging here come the 100th post of this blog. I know it's terrible compared to other blogger who post 200 post and sometime even more in just 6 months. But I am happy with this achievement too. All the 100 posts here are close to my hear, something which I wrote because I strongly felt for it. Something which I wrote because I really wanted to share it with world. Today when I look back and read my own posts it gives me so much happiness and a feel of satisfaction.

I am very thankful to all the readers and followers of SUGARFREE who constantly supported and motivated me to write more and better. A big hug to all you guys. :)

I believe with every milestone achieved we should not just celebrate for it but should also learn from the mistakes made in past and prepare for next milestone. So here I declare the next target I am setting for this blog, in next one year I should finish 100 more posts on SUGARFREE. I will try my level best to achieve this target, and will need lots of love and support from you all to reach there. Thanks for being with me on this journey of blogging.

 

Beware you backstabber!!

Today morning someone’s attitude moved me badly, I felt that I have been backstabbed. I didn’t knew whom I should share this with, as I don’t want to prolong this topic. However I thought of dealing with the situation maturely. And matured ways always emphasize on communication, I too believe that communication is the key in any relationship be it marriage, parenting or friendship. There is no issue in this world that cannot be resolved if discussed by both parties with open heart and mind. However if any of this is missing then this communication will turn into an argument and situation can go worse.

From last 6 years I am living away from my family, and friends are only my second family here. I am not very quick in making friends, but when I make I try to keep them for lifetime. With friends we feel comfortable, we consider them as our siblings and we feel that we can share things with them which we cannot with our family. Sometimes it can be a secret or sometimes it can be general talk, but every time I am pouring my heart out in front of them. I don’t think I need to specify it to them every time that Please don’t share this with others, a friend should be able to understand the intensity of the matter and decided on their own about sharing what I shared about me with them.

 I have this habit of not sharing one friend’s secrets with another, whether he/she specified it to be a secret or not. I don’t like to be a communication channel between two people, all my friends are grown enough to face each other and talk on their own. If you feel sharing what friend A talked to you with friend B is not making you a backstabber then I think you are wrong. By dictionary backstabbing means “The action or practice of criticizing someone in a treacherous manner while feigning friendship”. I shared my feeling with you or my plans with you and you went and told the same to someone else because I did not mention that “please don’t tell anyone” in the beginning of the conversation. May be I did not wanted that person to know this or I wanted to tell them later on my own, in any case you have been unfaithful to me while being my friend, so you backstabbed me.

I know, most you may feel that friends can talk and sortout such small things. I agree to it 100%, but only till it happens for the first time. When it happens several times then I feel there is no use to talk to such people and I prefer maintaining distance from them.

Someone may say “Oh that happened by mistake. He/she is very good at heart but little absent minded or he/she has childish nature” then I am not interested in being friends with absent minded or childish people. I would prefer saying goodbye than being a source of juicy topics for them.

And you the Backstabber stop this attitude of yours. Because I am leaving you without saying a word, but may be someone else will bring life out of you for doing the same with them.

What should I write about?

I am sure every blogger/writer must have faced writer’s block at least once if not many times. I am also going through the same phase, my blog is not updated from last 2 months and I have 3-4half written posts with me because I am not able to think of a proper finish for them. It is not just the lack of inspiration which is stopping me to write but there is lack of quality time too. 

Life is going on in its full pace, work, personal life and some extra work here and there keeps me busy all day long. There are so many things I want to do, which I mentally plan when I go to bed, but fail to execute my plan when I am awake. I know I know, I have also ready many self-help book which say that a real dream is one which keeps you awake. Or one should sleep one hour less to make time for things he/she loves to do. But when you are worked physically and mentally throughout the day, then giving up that 1 hour of sleep becomes quite difficult. Do I sound complaining, actually I have no complains. I love my life the way it is going now. I do what I am supposed to do, I shop what I like, I eat what I want and everything else is going fine. But I feel guilty for not working on my blog, not spending time on this space. 

At last I decided to do something about it and thought of writing one post every day, but I am not ready to commit something which I am not sure of doing. So I have resolute that I will update my blog at least once every week. If not a story every week then at least I will update here about the happenings in my life and things around me. I hope this will help me get out of this “no update” mode.

For now I am attaching two of my recent paintings in this post. I tried my hands on oil painting after good 10 years, I was very hesitant in the beginning but when I picked up the brush it felt amazing. Art is like riding a bicycle,when you don’t ride it for long time you are scared to ride but once you start it again you feel you have never stopped it :)

 

Lord Ganesha

 

 English roses