good bye

They say it's hard to say hello, 
I feel I can't say good bye.

I don't know when I will get to see you again,
but I know I have so many things to tell you

Still, I just leave. 
I just leave feeling confused, 
why I didn't say how much I am going to miss you

Why I didn't say, how nice it is to be with you.
Why I didn't say, that I don't want to leave,
and kept hoping that you will ask me to stay

The last memories of me you will have will be of our parting,
but did I make it something you can cherish?

In the rush of planning the next moment how I miss to live the now.
I could have said this, done that, is the only repent which stays

Hellos are important and so are goodbyes
Make your Hello cheerful and good bye warm.

Because from where we end, from there we start again!

Perfect Mother

Motherhood is rewarding yet challenging. My mother used to cook for me every time I crave to eat something special, on other hand I do order-in when my son asks for some special treat. My mom had to go and meet my teachers if she wanted any update on me, I can Whats-app my kid’s teacher or can investigate his daily activities through the school app. Technology has made life easier for all of us, including the mothers. Yet in this time and age being a mother is not simple.

Now the challenges are different. You are constantly getting judged and compared. The pressure of being the prefect mother, who have perfect kids and perfect home is more than ever. Mother who is expected to be in shape and look polished all the time, Mother who is working so that she can be the provider too and can bring more on table. There is a lot of compression and believe it or not we end up giving in to it mostly and burn ourselves.

Hence today on mother’s day I take a moment to congratulate all the mothers and tell them that you are doing amazingly great job as a mom. And never ever feel guilty for these:

• Your Body does not look like before, how it can be. It has shaped a human, kept a life inside it for 9 months and later nurtured it though breastfeeding.
•  The stretchmark which makes you shy away from flaunting your belly. Remember for every stretchmark you are sad about there is a woman who wants it.
• Your house is unkempt, that is okay. Kid is your priority, look after them, don’t be harsh on yourself. House will be cleaned later, or ask for help
• Took a career break, and there is a lot of competition out there. You will be few years behind in your career but the memories you created with kids while staying back home will be cherished forever.
• Going to work leaving an infant with someone else. When the kid grows up, they will have a role model of independence and multitasking. Also, they will become independent and social sooner.
•  Not able to attend all PTMs or take kid to every single activity and class due to your job timings. Kids will excel in things they are good at anyway and look-up to you for being committed to your work. Let your partner attend some, Dad and kid will improve their bond.
• You are human, so you make mistakes. Kids will learn to have acceptance and give chances. They will get to see real life and won’t be too disappointed when they grow up and face the world.

So, this Mother’s Day in place of signing the glory of mother’s love and sacrifices, let us accept and celebrate the imperfections. Because at end what my kid will remember about me is my love for him and nothing else. Because no mother is perfect or imperfect, every mother is the best mother to her kids.

 

प्यार

जो माँ से मिला, पापा ने दिया
क्या वो है प्यार ?

जो भाई को दिया, बहना से लिया
या वो है प्यार ?

जो दोस्तों और यारो से मिला,
या जो स्कूल की दीवारों पे लिखा
कौन सा है ये प्यार ?

जिसे देख के धड़कन थम सी गई,
या जिससे मिल के मुस्कराहट न रुकी
क्या वही था प्यार ?

जिसको सोच के रात भर मुस्कुराये,
या जिसके गम में दिन रात आंसू बहाये
कौन सा है ये प्यार ?

जो सर्दियों की सुबह को टिफ़िन में भरा,
जो आधी रात तुम्हारे लिए ड्राइव कर के गया
वो नहीं होता प्यार ?

उसके पास न हो कर भी साथ हो,
इसके साथ रह के भी दूर
ये कौन सा है प्यार ?

प्यार पवित्र है, गहरा है, है सीमाओं से परे,
पर क्या चीज है ये, क्या ये किसी के पल्ले पड़े ?

ये है इक ऐसी मृगतृष्णा जो तुम्हे दूर-दूर दौड़ाए,
और तेरे अंदर जो प्यार है उसे तू ढूंढ ही ना पाये
ये बाला है, मुसीबत है, तबाही है समझो,
फिर भी पूरी दुनिया प्यार की ही रट लगाए !!

#UnconditionalLove with the Zenfone

Love is a beautiful thing, and everyone should fall in love at least once in their life. In today’s world where everything comes with some “conditions applied” finding true unconditional love is a big challenge. Now our lives are so fast paced that we end up spending more time with our phones and other gadgets than our partners. This sometimes makes me feel that our smart phones are our real partners these days, without which we can’t even imagine our life. Now a person looks sadder when his/her phone crashes than when he/she is dumped by their girlfriend or boyfriend. When we are giving so much love, time and importance to our smart phones then we surly deserve to get back the same unconditional love from them.

Recently ASUS came up with their Zenfone range which promises to give unconditional love to its users. And five reasons which make me believe that this is my ideal Valentine are:

1.       Long-lasting togetherness:  With ultimate battery life of 12+ hours ASUS Zenfone makes sure to  be with me for hours without charging. It can stay with me like a true companion without giving me the headache of looking for charging stations after every few hours. And for someone like me who is lazy to charge my phone every day, this is a total bliss.

2.       Keeping me entertained: Like any other girl I like my partner to be entertaining. A boring companion is never fun to hangout with. With High resolution, big display it can bring life like experience to my favourite videos. The amazing sound quality can make me experience each and every beat of my favourite with clarity. And the awesome camera will let me capture each and every precious moment of my life on the go with ease.

3.       Touch of love: Now all the phones in market comes with touch screen but this one come with gorilla glass protection and has an anti fingerprint coating on screen. So I can touch it as much as I want and whenever I want without worrying about making the screen dirty. It has fast response time to the touch. So an impatient soul like me will always feel that someone is responding to my touch immediately.  

4.       Multitasking and high performance:  Every girl likes a smart companion, who can help her with in kitchen, and will help her with some office work too with the same ease. Same way this smart phone is such a multitasker that it lets you enjoy the music while checking your office emails or making presentations on the go.

5.       Being light on my pocket: it is not always true that only girlfriends are high maintenance, same is true with guys too. Even if your know someone who is scoring high on all your expectations as a partner but is out of your reach then there is no point in chasing them for years. Instead be with someone who you like and who can be yours. Available at great price point Zenfone is light on my pocket and is within my reach. It fulfils all my demands and puts no unwanted burden on my pocket. Total win-win!!

With these reasons the zenfone is surly a true companion for me, who can give me #UnconditionalLove this Valentine season. So if you are also looking for your share of #UnconditionalLove still then Zenfone is available here just for you :)

 

 

Our Platinum Day of Love

“Marriages are made in heaven but love happens on earth”. I have always been a very romantic person right from my teenage days, but I never expressed that to anyone. I used to read romantic novels, watch romantic movies and imagine myself as the protagonist in them, but whenever someone asked about my views on love my answer was always same “it’s waste of time”. In school I always left the “my views on Love section”  in slam books empty, or wrote that Loving my parents is love for me. In college I was busy shooing away the guys who proposed me because I was more conscious about retaining my “Love is waste of time” image than falling in love.  And then when I celebrated the silver jubilee of my existence in this world, my parents got a panic attack. They wanted me to get married. In spite of being from a conservative Brahmin family they allowed me to have a say in selecting my life partner.  I never knew what I want in my life partner but I exactly knew what I don’t want in him.

After marriage my life changed in many ways, as happens with every Indian girl. I was still getting adjusted to my new lifestyle when I got chance to travel abroad for work. I was supposed to travel just after 2 month of my wedding and the trip was for 3 months. People around me including some of my close friends were against my decision of accepting the travel opportunity. They felt that this is the most important period of my relationship and I should give it more preference than anything else. On the other hand my husband was always very supportive, he was happy for me. In spite of me asking him again and again about his opinion on my travel his answer remained same. He said it’s a great opportunity and I should not let it go. I was very excited about going to the USA, and was counting days. Finally the day came and I was all set to fly with 2 bulging suitcases.

My husband came with me to the airport, he was busy instructing me to take care of all important documents and other things and I busy telling him to go back home, as next day being a working day not sleeping full-night will take a toll on his health. Finally the check in started and it was time for us to say adieu. We hugged each other and at that point of time I felt very different. I felt as if I have so much to say to him but have no words to express. All this while I was checking time to go in but now I wanted some more time to be with him. I felt heavy but he kept a calm face, I was able to see care, concern and lots of love in his eyes. He smiled and asked me to leave as it was time. I slowly moved my trolley and went inside. All through the time I was standing in the baggage check in queue, my husband stood outside and we were able to see each other.  

After that for next round of formalities I was supposed to go to the next floor, I took the escalator and as I was moving up I just realized that this is the last time I am getting to see my husband in person. After this I will only meet him after 3 long months. I immediately took the escalator down and I found him still standing at the same place, he was looking straight at me. That was an amazing feeling, I was sad yet happy, I wanted to cry at the same time I wanted to shout and let him know what I feel for him. I called on his mobile phone, as we were on different sides of the glass wall. He gestured why after seeing my name flashing on his phone and I gestured him to pickup my call. As he picked up I said those three magical words to him and he repeated them for me too. It was not the first time that we said “I love you” to each other, but it was very deep this time. I gave him a flying kiss and he catched it in the most filmy way I ever imagined him doing.  I blushed and felt like some heroine in some romantic Bollywood movie. I was smiling but had tears in my eyes. That day we were far from each other still felt very close. That was our platinum day of love, the day when we knew that this love is going to last us forever and will never ever fade, just like the platinum.

After reaching the USA, there was not a single day when I did not miss him. He has been very supportive and caring throughout. He never complained about me being away and always kept my moral high too. That was the period we came to know each other even better than before.  That was the time I wrote love letters for the first time in my life, My husband used to laugh at me for doing all this but he preserved all those letters and cards I sent to him. And finally when I came back to India, he was already there to receive me at the airport. When I saw him there, I just left my luggage and ran to him like a child. He gave me a tight hug and said welcome back while taking out a rose from his jacket. I took the rose and held his hand very tight, as if I don't want to leave it ever. I felt very content, because I knew that this love will last forever and ever. And that made me believe that “Marriages are made in heaven but love always happens on earth”. ;)

Secondhand Love - Part III

Before reading this post author requests you to read part-1 and Part-2 of this story. That will help you enjoy the story better.

 

I got many calls from Aakash but I didn’t answer any. Richa too tried talking to me that night but I acted tired and went on bed early to avoid her questions.

I woke up with slight fever next day so Richa suggested me to take a day off. She made me breakfast and then left for college.

As some wise man said, spending some time with just you is the best way to introspect your problems. I eat my breakfast and then went back on bed. I was feeling tired but not sleepy. Our one bedroom kitchen house which otherwise feels so small looked very big and empty to me. I kept staring at the walls and started sinking in my thoughts, at one time I felt as if the wall are closing on me and I stared feeling suffocating. I took my phone and dialled Aakash’s number. Phone was ringing and my heartbeat was rising. After 2 rings I changed my mind and was about to hang-up when I heard Aakash’s voice “Hey Shikha, Hello can you hear me. I called you so many times, I am sorry Shikha.”

My silence was making him worried “Are you there Shikha, can you hear me? Hello”

“I am sorry Aakash” with so much of efforts I finally moved my lips. “I am sorry to disturb you in your office hours, but I want to meet you.”

                                                      ***************************

I had no energy to travel far so I asked Aakash to meet me in the public park near my house. It was lunch hours and Park was almost empty, usually no one goes to park in afternoons so benches were empty. I went and sat under a tree. In sometime Aakash was there, he came directly from office so he was in formals and he looked good as always. His office tag was still hanging around his neck; it was clear how much I panicked him by asking him to meet me urgently.

I was not able to meet eyes with him but he was behaving as if there is no problem between us. “How are you feeling now?” he asked while gently touching my forehead.

I sat quite, but inside me there was a tsunami going on. I had endless thought coming and going in my mind, I was silent but not calm. Finally I dared to look at Aakash and asked him “Why do you care for me so much?”

He kept his hand on mine “Because I love you Shikha”.

“You don’t even know me Aakash.” I was looking directly in his eyes. He was calm. “I know you Shikha. You are a sweet, adorable, loving girl. How has her own rules and idealism in life and I respect you for that. What more I need to know for loving you”

I looked down “I have an ugly past Aakash, which is still haunting me.”

 

                                                  *******************************

I was in 10th std, most important year of schooling. I have always been a studious kid, I kept myself away from everything which looked distracting. I had only one goal, to score high and to get admission in best college. That time we used to have many interschool festivals, I had interest in writing and I had won many prizes for my school in essay writing competitions. That year also I was participating in the competitions. Essay writing and Elocution competitions both were on same day. But to our bad luck the guy who was representing our school in Elocution competitions was absent; he has some health issue and was not able to make it there. Last minute finding a good replacement was very challenging for our teachers and she asked me to be the replacement. I was petrified as I was not very comfortable on stage but my teacher believed in me. She told me it is important for our school, if we are marked absent then we will get minus marks. I had no choice but to go for the competition.

I got the topic, which seemed easy to me as I knew about it but when I went on stage and saw so many people waiting to hear me I got nervous. I did whatever best I can but I was not happy with my performance. When I came down the stage one guy from other school, who was waiting for his turn smiled at me and said “nice points”. I didn’t bother to reply to him and went back where my teacher was. I didn’t know that this guy who is praising my points now is going to change my point of view towards life.

 

To be continued .....

 

 

 

Secondhand Love - Part II

Before reading this post author requests you to read part-1 of this story. That will help you enjoy the story better.

“Please Richs, we are not dating” I surged her hand off my shoulder.

“Oh Come-on  Shiks, I know you do not want everyone to know about your relationship, but you can’t hide it from me, after all I am your BFF” Richa smiled. 

When I was going through the worst phase of my life, other than my mom it was only Richa who stood by me. She was the one who will constantly try motivating me to bounce back and she was always on her toes to make me feel better.

I hugged her and said “I know you are my only BFF. And I am still not sure about Aakash. I want to be friends with him but not ready for anything else now, really!” 

Richa squeezed my hand warmly “I understand. Anyways give me all the update at night, okay. Need to rush for my class” she left and I went back for next lecture.

I and Richa are friends from 5^th std. Richa’s dad had a government job and his transfers used to disturb Richa and her brother’s schooling. That was why her parents decided to leave Richa and her brother with their grandparents. Her grandparents were our neighbors and Richa got admission in my class only. Her grandparents were very fond of me, and as I used to score well in class they asked me to help Richa with her studies so that she can catch up with new syllabus quickly. I always admired the liveliness and fun part of Richa. She was good in dance and sports. Her company used to make me happy and with time our bond grew so deep that we were more like sisters then friends. And now in this new city she only is my roommate too.

                                      *****************************

I reached the coffee shop 2-3 minutes early and Aakash was already there. “You came so early.” I said while shaking hands with him. He wore white polo T-shirt with khaki pants and was looking very smart in them. Aakash asked me what I would like to have and after placing our order we comfortably sat on my favorite corner seat. 

“So tell me, what is it, which you do not want to talk over phone” I asked him while keeping my bag down. 

“Why are you in hurry always? You just want to hear what I have to say and leave?” he made fun of me.

“Nothing like that, I thought you have something serious to discuss. You know I have lots of assignments to finish.” I defended myself. But the truth was I wanted to hear what he has to say as I was able to see soothing coming my way and I was really confuse about that.

“Actually, I have been selected for an onsite assignment and my boss really wants me to go for it.” He said while sipping water from his glass.

“Oh that’s great. For a software engineer getting an onsite project is like a dream come true right? Congratulations to you. Is this my treat for that?” I laughed.

“Not at all. Actually I wanted to know your views. I mean, you know….” He paused for minute and I didn’t said anything.

After a long pause he said “Okay, Shikha lets not play this hide and seek game anymore. You know what I feel for you” I was still silent.

3 months ago I met Aakash in Aadi’s Birthday Party. Aadi was Richa’s friend and when she asked me to accompany her for the party I went there with her. Aakash was also there in that party and in his words it was love at first sight for him. He approached me in the party but as I have promised myself I behaved reserved. After that on few more occasions we crossed each other’s way and I am very sure it was not a coincidence every time. Finally when I felt that Aakash is a genuine guy I came out of my cocoon, we became friends. I knew Aakash has feelings for me and he is a great guy but my past never let me go free. It was very tough for me to believe people, and the fear of getting hurt was making me stay away from relationship. However deep-down I knew that this day will come soon, when I have to face my fears and my past.

We drank our coffee in silence and when it was time for me to leave Aakash held my hand “it is killing me Shikha. Please speak.”

I pulled my hand back and took out my wallet to pay for my coffee. I never liked others to pay for me, so whenever we went out we shared the bill. Aakash stopped me from giving money and asked me to keep the wallet inside “Please Shikha, stop it. I want to do all this for you. I want to give you the best, I want to make you smile, I want to keep you happy, and I want to take care of you.” He was sounding tense now.

By now some people in the coffee shop already stated staring at us, it was bothering me. I took my bag and stood to leave. Aakash also stood and come face to face; he held my hands very tight his face all red “I love you Shikha, Please be mine.” 

I was not able to take it anymore, I broke down and started crying. Aakash was clueless, and he started apologizing. I took my hands out of his and left that place without saying a word to him.

  
To be continued..... Here