good bye

They say it's hard to say hello, 
I feel I can't say good bye.

I don't know when I will get to see you again,
but I know I have so many things to tell you

Still, I just leave. 
I just leave feeling confused, 
why I didn't say how much I am going to miss you

Why I didn't say, how nice it is to be with you.
Why I didn't say, that I don't want to leave,
and kept hoping that you will ask me to stay

The last memories of me you will have will be of our parting,
but did I make it something you can cherish?

In the rush of planning the next moment how I miss to live the now.
I could have said this, done that, is the only repent which stays

Hellos are important and so are goodbyes
Make your Hello cheerful and good bye warm.

Because from where we end, from there we start again!

काश

मेरे  हर पल का हिसाब रखने वाले,
काश तुमने मेरा भी ख़याल रखा होता 

आईने के सामने के मेरे वक़्त को गिनने वाले,
मर्दो से भरे इस जहान में हर रोज जो लड़ाईया मैं  लड़ती हूँ उनको भी गिना होता 

मेरी आँखो में जो काजल मैं भरती हूँ 
उसकी जग़ह जो ग़म मैं उनमे छुपाती हूँ उसे देखा होता  

मेरी परेशानियों और थकान को भूलकर एक पल भी बैठे बीना 
घऱ में घुसते ही जो काम पे लग जाती हूँ उसे भी देखा होता 

तुमसे ज्यादा करने के बाद भी तुमसे बराबर होने के लिए 
जो मैं रोज घर के बाहर जाती हूँ  उसे भी देखा होता 

मेरी चुप्पी को गुरुर समझने के पहले 
उसके पीछे जो निराशा हैं उसे देखा होता 

औरत को नर्म होना है  बचपन से ये सीखा तुमने 
पर उसके सख्त होने की वज़ह  को अगर जाना होता 

जानती हूँ करली उम्मीद मैंने ज्यादा की 
काश मेरे जिस्म की जग़ह रूह को छू पते तुम 

मेरी खूबियों को बेशक न देखना तुम कभी,
कमियों के आगे बढ़ कर काश मुझे देख पाते तुम 

Life Happens

In the summers of late 1980’s the first born boy of a well know north Indian Brahmin family got hitched to a beautiful first born girl of another well-known Brahmin Family. Summer was on its peak and so was their love and then after 9 months Life Happened and yours truly came into this world J

From childhood, I have been trained that I need to take the legacy of the first born to next level and show all the younger ones how to lead life. Not just my own siblings, my first cousins, my second, third, fourth cousins, my neighborhood kids, I was supposed to be the role model for everyone. 4 year old kid and so much pressure to perform, I became a perfect obedient child any parent would want. But that also made me an introvert. Or should I say I had split personality disorder, because I was a super fun child in school but very serious and studious kid at home. I was doing good in studies and well in co-curricular activities, teacher’s pet and a perfect role model, life was going fine for everyone until my parents decide to add some spice in my life.

They made me, the not so sporty girl to go in NCC (National Cadet Core), and like the obedient girl I was, I joined it for them. First time I stayed away from home for a week. Homesick and socked as we used to sleep on floor and bath inside a tent in a jungle, I was counting days to go back home. And on the final day, I came to know that this camp was the selection camp for basic leadership camp and I am selected for next camp which means I must live here for 10 more days.  My uncle who used to live in that same city was there to meet me, I was crying to go back home and hence he called my mom. She heard me out and asked me to give the phone to my uncle and told him, make sure she stays there and does not run back home. I was stunned, did my parents disowned me? Will I always live in this jungle?

Now I had only one way to survive, I must like what is there in front of me, accept it and move on. Therefore, I gave my 100% in those 10 days in all the assignments and activities we got to do. I tried to make friends so that my stay becomes comfortable. Soon I stared to like this whole thing and an introvert started to open-up. Next year I took part in republic day camp and represented my state in national. Won the nationals in rifle shooting and 1^st runner up in best cadet nationwide. It was indeed a very proud moment for me and my family when I got to shake hands with our then prime minister Mr. Atal Bihari Bajpai. I returned home after 2 months as a very confident teenager, and that’s where life happened.

However, soon after that I had my boards and being the first born I had to do very well there, you see role model. And as an obedient kid from middle class Indian family, I went for engineering and became one J

Years flew, campus was done, I had a job offer in my hand, but patents decided to give a new twist in the tale. They wanted me to stay back home and look for some opportunity in my hometown, as they were worried how I will live alone in a big city. And I was shocked, are they not the same people who made sure I don’t come back home from that jungle. But I decided to do things my way this time and came to Bangalore. And life happened when parents saw me not just surviving in a new city alone but also living happily and doing well at work.

Years passed and now parents had an-other thing in their “TO DO list” which they were eager to tick out and hence started looking for alliance for me. In the search of same I met this snooty guy whom I hated in beginning and later fell for. Yes, life happened again to me in the most unexpected way and time.

By nature, Indians are very caring people. We care about what’s happening in other’s life more than what’s going on in our own. Hence now it was time for me to prove to the society that my reproductive system is working fine. On first day of my maternity break I was feeling so bored, I though let me go to a parlor and waste my hared earned money. Due date was still 15 days away but as expected, life happens to me when I expect it the least. I was rushed from a massage room to the labor room. And the most beautiful part of my life I lived that day amid all the madness which was going around.

Even now after all these years, the pressure of being the role model and perfect first born is still there. But the intensity has reduced over time. Now whenever I get to talk to my younger cousins, or colleagues and friends. I tell them that don’t be like anyone else, just be what you are. because you cannot control life you can only live life. And the most magical moments of your life will happen when you expect it the least. Moments which will change your perspective and thinking and make you a better and happier version of yourself. So you just keep living and let the life happen!

PS: This write-up was my Ice breaker speech in Toastmasters 

5 Things I learned the Hardway

Life is not a bed of roses, not even for the most blessed people, they have their own set of challenges. And especially when you want to improve yourself and your life with every passing day, it’s not a cakewalk. Everyday bring us different experiences, it’s up to us if we want to learn from those or let it go. Every person who crosses our life and every incident which takes place is an opportunity to absorb and improve ourselves. And in my existence on this planet, in the process of becoming better and happier I have learned few things the hard way

1    1. You can’t make everyone happy

How much ever you like this to happen, it’s very difficult to make everyone around you happy. Each one can have different requirements and at times they can be contradictory to one another. You cannot make the points meet in such case. So, stop taxing yourself for pleasing everyone. I used to be a people-pleaser, will always put everyone before me, but I never got such gesture back from them. I kept burning myself and slowly there was lot of frustration buildup. Hence, I decided to stop pleasing everyone around me. I do things which are important, I try not to hurt anyone knowingly, but I don’t go extra miles to satisfy all of them in all possible ways.

2    2.  Your happiness is the key

Now that you are not busy pleasing other, concentrate on yourself. An empty glass can’t fill another one, until you are happy you can’t spread positivity. I have seen this personally, when I am happy I am more productive. My positive feeling radiates to people around me. When I sulk, I can’t be my best, and my happiness is my responsibility. So, work on your own happiness, create it, don’t expect other to do it for you.

3    3.  Be what you are

Never ever pretend to be what you are not. We pretend mostly to mingle with few or please few others. But that is not healthy for you. You can’t be what you are not for long and it will be disappointing for others also to know that they never knew the real your, comes across as a negative trait. Mostly people pretend to please others and as said earlier, you can’t please all and be happy. Be yourself, you will be comfortable, and you will find people around your who really value YOU. At the same time, be clear that pretending and improving are two different things 😊

4    4.  Physical and mental health are one

I learned this when I was going through a very low phase in my life (sometimes we tend to miss on our blessing and start counting only issues). Work stress was at its peak and I was still a new mother, I was trying hard to make ends meet and that somewhere was taking toll on me. When I talked about this to an expert, first thing she asked me was, do you drink enough water, do you do any physical activity/exercise, do you sleep enough. And as soon as I tried taking care of these things for a week, I saw significant improvement in my mood and behavior. I was amazed to see this and from then I am a true believer that mental and physical health are interrelated. So be whatever, do take time out to take care of yourself. Keep yourself hydrated, try to sleep for 6 hours at least, and do some exercise be it yoga/gym/ or just some walk. You will see the changes in you yourself.

1    5.  You have time

And after reading all the above points if your response is that I don’t have time to do any of this, then my friend you are wrong. You have time, you have good amount of time to do everything you want to do. All you need to do is, prioritize what you want to do and why. Cut on your screen time or time on internet and you will have time to exercise, read a book, meet a friend or have a hobby. It’s all about prioritizing and willingness to do. Trust me when I say this I am a mother of 4 after all 😊

Perfect Mother

Motherhood is rewarding yet challenging. My mother used to cook for me every time I crave to eat something special, on other hand I do order-in when my son asks for some special treat. My mom had to go and meet my teachers if she wanted any update on me, I can Whats-app my kid’s teacher or can investigate his daily activities through the school app. Technology has made life easier for all of us, including the mothers. Yet in this time and age being a mother is not simple.

Now the challenges are different. You are constantly getting judged and compared. The pressure of being the prefect mother, who have perfect kids and perfect home is more than ever. Mother who is expected to be in shape and look polished all the time, Mother who is working so that she can be the provider too and can bring more on table. There is a lot of compression and believe it or not we end up giving in to it mostly and burn ourselves.

Hence today on mother’s day I take a moment to congratulate all the mothers and tell them that you are doing amazingly great job as a mom. And never ever feel guilty for these:

• Your Body does not look like before, how it can be. It has shaped a human, kept a life inside it for 9 months and later nurtured it though breastfeeding.
•  The stretchmark which makes you shy away from flaunting your belly. Remember for every stretchmark you are sad about there is a woman who wants it.
• Your house is unkempt, that is okay. Kid is your priority, look after them, don’t be harsh on yourself. House will be cleaned later, or ask for help
• Took a career break, and there is a lot of competition out there. You will be few years behind in your career but the memories you created with kids while staying back home will be cherished forever.
• Going to work leaving an infant with someone else. When the kid grows up, they will have a role model of independence and multitasking. Also, they will become independent and social sooner.
•  Not able to attend all PTMs or take kid to every single activity and class due to your job timings. Kids will excel in things they are good at anyway and look-up to you for being committed to your work. Let your partner attend some, Dad and kid will improve their bond.
• You are human, so you make mistakes. Kids will learn to have acceptance and give chances. They will get to see real life and won’t be too disappointed when they grow up and face the world.

So, this Mother’s Day in place of signing the glory of mother’s love and sacrifices, let us accept and celebrate the imperfections. Because at end what my kid will remember about me is my love for him and nothing else. Because no mother is perfect or imperfect, every mother is the best mother to her kids.

 

DIY- Bottle Photo frame

DIY and crafts are such a stress buster, it gives me lot of happiness and satisfaction. The confidence boost for the creative me and the pleasure of recycling or up-cycling the old/unwanted stuff make me glad. Below is a pic of few of the bottles which I pained in past using acrylic paints or glass paints for your reference 😊 they are easy to do and looks beautiful on display.

But this time I wanted to do something other than painting them, and the idea of making bottle photo frame stuck to me. To my surprise it came out very well, it’s easy and fun craft to do with kids also during summer vacation.

This bottle my brother got from Thailand for me, I like its shape, wide enough to display picture, hence I selected this bottle for this craft. Enough of my blabbering, let me share with you all, how I made this bottle photo frame.

Things we need:

·       Empty clean glass bottle

·       Sand

·       Sea shells (as I had beach theme in mind)

·       Pearls or beads for decoration

·       Hot glue gun

·       skewer sticks

·       Photo of your choice

1# First, gather all the stuff at one place so that you don’t have to move around looking for things 😊

2# using a funnel put the sand inside the bottle, little at a time. I have used black and normal sand. Fill only less than ¼ of the bottle. In case you don’t have funnel handy, use a pager like I did in picture.

3# Now roll the photo and insert it inside the bottle. Go slow, make sure it goes and sits well in the sand. Do cut the picture if its big for the bottle. Adjust it inside the bottle using the skewer sticks. Have patience and do this slowly, don’t shake the bottle else the sand might come out

4# Add seashell or anything which you want to add inside the bottle for decoration (as per your theme). Using skewer sticks adjust it at the place you want it to sit. I added only 2 as bottle was small.

5# once you get your desired placement of photo inside the bottle, tie some cotton on skewer sticks and carefully clean the bottle from inside for any stains of sand and dust.

6# now it’s time to seal our creation. If you have the original cap of bottle, then use that or else you can use beads or shell etc. like I did.

7# using beads, glitters, pearls etc. decorate the bottle from outside as per your choice. I used seashells, hot glue gun helped to stick them on glass bottle.

8# Done! Put it on display 😊

The picture I have used here was taken during out Dubai vacation. It was Vivaan’s first Beach visit, so I wanted this picture to be framed with beach theme. I have kept it on shelf along with other souvenirs we had got from Dubai, and they all look great together😊 I am very happy with the outcome and hope you all like it too. Now go and try it out yourself. Happy Crafting!!

Lucky Go Happy

Holla everyone,

First of all sorry for so less frequency of posts. But I hope things will change soon😊

As we have our sister Blog here ..... "Drum Rolls Please"

Lucky Go Happy

This space will mainly be there for all Hobbies and travel related posts.

Please read, subscribe and share and show your love.

BTW, the post on my recent Bali trip is already up there 😊 Do check out.

जिंदगी

जिंदगी तु बस  इतना  बता  की  तु चाहतीं क्या है....
क्या भीड़  में  भी तनहाई तेरी  जरूरत हैं|

अपनो के  नाम  पे  तुघे परछाई  तक बर्दाश्त नहीं....
अंधेरो  से इश्क़ करना  हीं  तेरी फितरत  है ?

जो मिलता  नहीं उसके  पीछे  दौड़ी  चली  जा  रही  है....
जो पास  है उसे  भूल  जाना  तेरी आदत है ?

तू खिचेगी  मुझे  या मैं  तुझको  थामूंगी, ये  फैसला  मेरा  होगा  तेरे  मशवरे की न मुझे जरुरत है  ....

मैं धुंडु  रौशनी या खुद  सवेरा  बन  जाऊ  ...ये मेरी  चाह  है तेरी राह  नहीं |

अपनी  खुशियों  में खिल  जाऊ या जल  के रौशन  उनको  कर  जाऊ ...अब  बस यही  सवाल  है, शिकायत  कोई  नहीं !

प्यार

जो माँ से मिला, पापा ने दिया
क्या वो है प्यार ?

जो भाई को दिया, बहना से लिया
या वो है प्यार ?

जो दोस्तों और यारो से मिला,
या जो स्कूल की दीवारों पे लिखा
कौन सा है ये प्यार ?

जिसे देख के धड़कन थम सी गई,
या जिससे मिल के मुस्कराहट न रुकी
क्या वही था प्यार ?

जिसको सोच के रात भर मुस्कुराये,
या जिसके गम में दिन रात आंसू बहाये
कौन सा है ये प्यार ?

जो सर्दियों की सुबह को टिफ़िन में भरा,
जो आधी रात तुम्हारे लिए ड्राइव कर के गया
वो नहीं होता प्यार ?

उसके पास न हो कर भी साथ हो,
इसके साथ रह के भी दूर
ये कौन सा है प्यार ?

प्यार पवित्र है, गहरा है, है सीमाओं से परे,
पर क्या चीज है ये, क्या ये किसी के पल्ले पड़े ?

ये है इक ऐसी मृगतृष्णा जो तुम्हे दूर-दूर दौड़ाए,
और तेरे अंदर जो प्यार है उसे तू ढूंढ ही ना पाये
ये बाला है, मुसीबत है, तबाही है समझो,
फिर भी पूरी दुनिया प्यार की ही रट लगाए !!

Wordless Wednesday -13

Creation

·        I created you, You evolved me.

P.

PPS: 6WS (6 word story, is a form of storytelling in just 6 words)

Resolutions

A year with no post... but does that mean I had a year which was not eventful or worth sharing? No, not at all. This year was as much eventful as any other year have been so far.

Its true that after becoming a mother my priorities have changed a bit and now I need to make time for my hobbies in places of enjoying my ideal time in hobbies. I can see many mom's heads nodding here☺

in March 2015 our bundle of joy came to us wrapped in blue. 9 months of wait and a painful labor ( which needs a different post to describe our funny stories ) later I get to meet our little Vivaan. And from that moment my life has changed a lot, like it happens to any new mother. Days were long and nights were sleepless. When Vivaan turned 4 months I joined back at work full time, which added to my already busy life. So prioritizes changed and some things took back seat, this blog being one of them. I still tried writing sometimes for some campaigns, as that defined topic and restricted word count was helping me keep my blog alive.

However, when Vivaan turned a preschooler and I tried to take-up more responsibilities at work, "sugerfree" ended up with no posts at all for the whole 1.5 years. But I had hopes that some day I will start writing again, and hence I kept on paying fee for my domain name every single year.

first week of a New Year is usually the time when people make and break resolutions. Like many of you I also took few resolutions and decided to act upon each one of them before I end-up breaking them 😜

I feel the best way to be able to act upon your resolutions is by writing them down somewhere visible, or sharing it with your friends and family. They will miss no opportunity to remind you that how bad it is of you to break your resolution 😂

I wish and will try my level best to stick to a plan and be active on this space as much as I can. And before I press the submit button in excitement let me Wish you all a very - very Happy and prosperous New Year, may this year be more meaningful, eventful, joyful and exciting than last one.... Cheers!! 

Our Ideal Yatra

"The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page"

I am a true believer of this line. There are many trips I have taken till date, few were with friends, few with family, and few alone. But there is this one trip which is very close to my heart, which I and my husband took 2 years ago.

I was in the USA for a work assignment for 4 months, and our plan was to visit Dubai by end of my trip. However due to some last minute changes in my assignment our Dubai plans did not workout. I was very upset about it as I was really looking forward to my first international trip with my better half. Though when our plan failed, my husband came up with a new trip plan. He decided to come to the USA towards end of my assignment and have a road trip here.

Then began our search for cheap International Flights from India to San Francisco with shortest travel time. And finally on 13^th July he was there in the USA, I had lots of work on my plate but his presence gave me strength. As I had to go to office too, first few days we explored the down town and nearby food joints only, and decided to go to Las-Vegas on coming long weekend.

We drove a rented car from San Jose to Las Vegas. We did night drive, and reached Vegas after 6 to 7 hours of drive. We had booked our stay in casino Circus-Circus, but we reached earlier than the check-in time so we tried our luck in roulette. Lady luck was on our side that day and we ended the game after doubling our money. It was a nice start to our trip. At 11’o clock when we finally got our room we took some rest. After a good sleep we both got ready and went out to explore the Las Vegas strip.

The energy outside was amazing. There were many street artists out there and there were different shows happening from different casinos. We watched all the must watch shows and explored almost all the casinos on the Las Vegas strip. Around mid-night only we came back to our room, as next morning we had to drive to Arizona to see the Grand Canyon.

We started at 7 in the morning from Vegas to Grand Canyon and stopped by to see the Hoover Dam. Around 2 in afternoon we reached the Grand Canyon. We were mesmerized by the beauty and grandness of this place. By evening 6 we headed back from there to Las Vegas. Around 1 at night we reached back to our room in Circus-Circus and rested.

Next day again we explored the remaining casinos on the Las Vegas Strip and in evening we went to the famous Fremont street. That street has a digital ceiling with vibrant video playing on it with awesome music. It was one of its kind we have seen so far. We explored the city till late night and slept for some time so that we can drive back to San Jose the next day. In 3 days we drove around 3 states of the USA and created memories for life time.

After coming back to San Jose we visited Napa Valley and San Francisco too. Finally I was able to wrap up my assignment with a vacation which was so much fun. This vacation is very dear to me and my husband till date.

Real Togetherness

In this digital age when everyone has so much information and entertainment available on their fingertips, it is actually making us isolated from the real world. You can find people looking at their smart phones or tablets while walking. If you fall on the road chances are that you will not get a hand for help as everyone will be busy on their gadgets and will not even notice you. In this digital world we are more connected to a Stranger sitting miles away than someone who is sitting just next to us.   

We had one meal together rule in our house and we used to love it. That used to be our time to catch up with each other. After marriage it was just 2 of us who used to eat one meal together every day. But In-between I happened to go for a long business trip and that was when my husband developed this habit of watching videos in his laptop while having dinner. He will have earphones on so he was totally disconnected from me. This was really bothering me. I even told him that it is bad manner to not talk to the person eating with you and only look at your laptop, but he had many excuses. Like he doesn’t get any time to watch his favourite series, this is an important episode and so on. Even on vacations we used to get more connected to outside world then each other, blame free wifi for that.

But then this onetime we went for holidaying in a jungle resort where there was no wifi. Even getting cellular network was difficult over there. We had no TV in room too, so only way of entertainment we had was each other’s company. I must say that the absence of all the digital connectivity actually helped us connect with each other better. We spent lots of time together on beach and did many fun activities. We had our dinner together on the beach below the sky full of stars. We shared out childhood memories, teenage gossips, dreams and goals with each other. And it actually helped us a lot to know each other even better. We were amazed that even after living together for 2 years we knew so less about each other. And getting off the digital connectivity gave us so much time to know each other so very well. We were so happy with this whole experience that we decided to go to that place again and do one jungle resort holiday each year, where we can be close to nature and each other.

Now that we have a baby, we would like to spend simile quality time with him too, So that we all connect better with each other. And to do that if we will have to be disconnected from the digital world for sometimes then why not, After all this real togetherness is actually worth it.  

The Fastest Network

In today’s world when all the information is just a click away from us having good Internet connectivity 24/7 is very important. Now the power of Internet is so much that be it knowledge, entertainment, shopping, or money matters each and everything is there on it. I am a big Internet buff myself, I search for anything to everything on Internet and it is the most trusting source of knowledge I have with me these days.

I am a new mom who is curious about everything related to her baby, during pregnancy and after it also I always turned to Internet to find answers for my questions. My mom was so jealous of it that on several occasions she told me to search the same on Internet if I don’t believe her. As much as I rely on Internet for knowledge that much my husband rely on it for entertainment. He is a big Hollywood movie buff and a big fan of many well-known series. He has a good collection of both and he keeps adding new one to his collection by downloading them from Internet. However he hates to download low quality prints and the good prints are bigger in size which takes longer to download and that makes him really restless. On the other hand I like to be connected on the go all the time, but my mobile data does not support the speed I want most of the time. If I have a question and I am not able to see the video related to that due to Internet slowness it irritates the hell out of me. 

 

So if we will get a 4G Internet connection which is super-fast, me and my husband will be super happy. I will be able to see and learn a lot of things from Internet be it backing a cake, making baby food, decorating his nursery or how to solve an issue with my laptop keyboard. I will be able to cook with the video running alongside, no more burnt food due to the long buffering time which leaves me clueless about the next step. And my husband will be able to download and watch new movies and series as soon as the good prints are available, no overnight weighting. Having the 4G speed connectivity in my phone will enable me to be able to browse from anywhere and I will be able to keep myself occupied and entertained even when I am stuck in bad  traffic :P

As we both are working professionals, who on most of the days bring work to home will also be benefited by fast network. We will be able to wrap up work quickly and will have more time to relax and unwind. Now we are so much dependent on Internet that having the faster network connectivity is the need of the hour. Just a faster speed connection can change our life so much for the better that I can't wait to try it on myself :)